7 Things Not to Post When You Divorce
In general, posting personal and delicate information on social media is tricky. But, as we all know, the standards and guidelines that once seemed pretty cut and dry have been falling by the wayside more and more. Still, there are some topics that you should avoid if you are going through a divorce. Here is our list of 7 things not to post when you divorce.
- Anything you talk to your lawyer about.
We’re starting with this because it’s important and we want you to know it’s important. Always keep yourself in check by asking yourself whether this post will refer in any way to something you talked with your Findling Law lawyer about. If it does, don’t post it. If you’re not sure, don’t post it. There are other things to post about. Or, call a friend instead.
- Details about the kids.
Divorce can be a bumpy process and not everyone gets along all the time. One of the most contentious issues in a divorce is the kids – who has them, when, where, for how long, and what will they be doing and with whom.
Enjoy your time with your kids and take lots of pictures for yourself. One day when things have settled into a new normal, decide whether you still need to post any of them. Today, though, just keep it to yourself or share privately with your family members who will appreciate them the most. Depending on your security settings, what you post can be seen not just by friends, but also by friends of friends. Which means that more people know what your kids were up to than you expected.
- Your feelings about your situation, your spouse, or how the divorce is going.
One of the best and worst things about social media is that it offers a captive audience at all times. If you ever need an almost immediate reaction, support, or response from a human, this is where you’ll get it at almost any time of the day or night. Even choosing when and how to announce your divorce is going to be complicated.
But, hold back now. You might feel like referring to “that someone” or “you-know-who” and slip out what ticked you off today. It really will do more harm than good. Chances are that the post will be seen by someone who will tell “that someone” what you had to say and now you have a new conflict on your hands that could have been avoided. No one can be offended if you don’t post it.
- Money, property divisions, anything to do with assets of any kind.
In general, social media is not the place to talk about your assets and liabilities. Sure, you might be frustrated with the mountains of accounting, paperwork, or delay in itemizing or separating assets, but don’t give out the details in a post. How much you do or don’t have (or will or won’t get in the end) is your private information. Sharing it publicly can make you a target by thieves and scammers.
- If you’re moving, keep your address and personal info to yourself.
You already know that you shouldn’t post your address on social media. And that goes for now, too! If you are moving, don’t tell the world where you are moving to. If you have to mention it, keep it vague, mentioning only that you are looking forward to your new home in a beautiful, new neighborhood or city. Leave out the details. You can privately send a change of address card or email to the people who need that address.
- Dates you’ll be out of the house.
Just as you would never post the dates of your upcoming vacation or business trip, don’t mention when you’re going to be meeting with your lawyer, at court, at a meeting, or elsewhere. It’s begging for unscrupulous characters to know that you won’t be home and make it a target.
- All your new romantic interests.
The whole world doesn’t need to know your personal business. That’s what your best friend is for, and you can reach him or her in other ways than through the public forum that social media is. Make it a private message and leave it at that.
One last thing: resist the urge to post when you’ve had a glass of wine or two. Your inhibitions are lowered and so is your judgement. Save yourself the regret. Keep in mind this list of things not to post when you divorce to help guide you as you’re riding the roller coaster of emotional ups and downs.
Of course, we’re not trying to boss you around or sound like your mother. But, we do want you to be safe and for your divorce to proceed smoothly and without unexpected surprises. If you are going to be active on social media, keep your posts general and positive. Don’t attack your ex, and leave the kids out of it. If you need to vent or get some support from your friends without telling everyone everything, set up a group chat, meet at a local restaurant, or invite them over.
We understand that people struggle with the uncertainties of what life could be like during and after divorce. We can help you set goals and help you manage your situation.
About Findling Law:
I have been in practice for 20 years and practice exclusively in divorce and family law. My practice includes several attorneys who share the core value of practicing law to help people navigate change in their life, without compromising principles. We have extensive experience in high socio-economic, high profile and high conflict cases which has nurtured a skill set applicable to all divorce and family law cases regardless of socio-economic status. We recognize that it is the application of the law that is most important aspect of practice. That is why we provide more free information on divorce and family law than any other Michigan law firm.
We want to help you manage your situation. Let our exceptional legal team help you . . .
Local: +1 (248) 399-3300 – toll free: (877-YOUR FIRM)
After hours emergency?: +1 (707) 968-7347
Or email me at: Daniel@Findlinglaw.com
By: Daniel Findling
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