Divorce is, hands down, one of the most challenging things life will throw at you and at your kids. Many parents find that their kids retreat within themselves during this tumultuous time and communication between parents and kids can be hard. Arm yourself with a list of conversation starters to get your kids talking, and you might find it a little easier to break the ice. And, keep the chatter alive with open-ended follow-up questions – like those starting with how and why – that allow for more stories to be told and details to be revealed.
About the Day
- What did you do at recess today?
- What’s your homework list look like today?
- Tell me how your day was today.
- How was the bus ride/walk to/from school today?
- Please help me with dinner. Do you feel like chopping the veggies or setting the table?
- What good deeds did you do today? You know, it can be little things, so you probably said or did something for someone today.
- Tell me about what the cafeteria was serving up today.
About Making Plans
- What are you going to do this weekend? Any plans for the weekend?
- Are there any movies coming out that interest you?
- What do you feel like doing this weekend when we’re together?
- What are your favorite board games? How about we play one today/tonight/this weekend?
- Tell me about that video game you’re into right now. What do you have to do to win/succeed?
- Do you feel like getting some fresh air/exercise this weekend? What do you feel like doing?
- If we can have the day together – just you and me – what would want to do?
- We have free time on Tuesday evening. Give me some ideas on what we can do together that night.
Nothing to Do With Anything Questions
- If you could be any kind of animal, what would it be? Why?
- If you could go anywhere in the world – even into space – where would you go? For how long? Why do you choose that place?
- If you could be any movie character, who would it be?
- If you could meet any athlete/celebrity/singer/famous person, who would it be?
- If you could have any job in the world, which would you choose?
- If you could take a few days off school – no, you actually can’t, but IF you could – what would you do with yourself? Who would you want to join you?
- What if you could take just one day off school? What would you do with that day?
- I don’t think I could live without a toaster oven. What do you think is an awesome invention?
- What do you think – is there life on other planets that we don’t know about?
- If there was going to be a movie about you, who would be cast to play you?
- What’s the latest gadget that the kids are talking about these days? I’m so out of touch with technology.
- What music are you listening to these days? What do you like about it?
- Tell me what food you want to eat this week. I’m open to suggestions.
- What did you think about that commercial with the … ?
- What’s the last thing you Googled? What made you Google that?
- I really liked [insert name of movie]. What’s the best movie you ever watched? What was so good about it?
- Tell me five things that you are glad about.
- What is the next thing that you want to accomplish in school/your sport/elsewhere?
- Tell me about that book you are reading for school right now.
- What do you think makes a family? Are we there? Just about there? What is missing for our family to be happy in your opinion?
- How are you feeling about what is happening in our family?
- Do you miss your [insert other parent]? What can we do to help you feel better?
- Tell me about your friend [insert name].
- How much bullying do you see at school? How are the school officials – teachers, principals – dealing with it?
- Tell me what you’re scared of the most right now.
Get the Conversation Started
As you can see, it is less about what you talk about than it is that you do talk. Anywhere, anytime – whether it is at the dinner table, in a waiting room, on the drive to school or a game – you name it. Find your little moments and help your child know that you want to have that conversation, and that you are listening, too. You never know what you’ll discover about one another and you will help each other build an important relationship during a challenging time.
About Findling Law
I have been exclusively practicing divorce and family law in Michigan for over two decades. The attorneys at Findling Law all share the core value of practicing law to help people navigate change in their lives, without compromising principles. We specialize in high socio-economic, high-profile and high-conflict cases, while also working with clients of all backgrounds. We recognize that the most important aspect of the practice of law is the application of the law to your specific circumstances.
That is why we provide more free information on divorce and family law than any other Michigan law firm. We want to help you manage your situation. Allow our exceptional legal team to help you navigate the change in your life, without compromising principles.
We want to help you manage your situation. Let our exceptional legal team help you . . .
Local: +1 (248) 399-3300 – toll free: (877-YOUR FIRM)
Or email me at: Daniel@Findlinglaw.com
By: Daniel Findling